Anywhere there is a talk or mention of BDSM (bondage, discipline, submission and masochism), there must be talk of a dominatrix or mistress. A dominatrix simply means a woman who takes the active or better still dominating role in BDSM activities. BDSM has diverse fetishes and many mistresses scattered across the world. For the sake of this article, the focal point will be on the London dominatrix and the prejudices they encounter in the BDSM world and the world at large.
It is no news, BDSM is not a traditional sexual activity and because of this, a London dominatrix tends to face prejudices or criticism. Let’s look at some of the common prejudices associated with a London dominatrix.
● Many people believe they are escorts. There is a clear difference between an escort who engages in BDSM and a professional dominatrix. Being a dominatrix means there is actually no sexual intercourse while being an escort means engaging in sex acts for hire. So, there is a clear line between being a professional dominatrix and being an escort.
● Many people believe that they are dangerous and just inflict pain for no reason. Contrary to popular belief, the BDSM community actually prides itself on physical safety and a London dominatrix is of no exception. BDSM is not just plain dangerous as most people view rather it goes a little extra to carry out fetishes and fulfill fantasies.
● A lot of people believe that what a London dominatrix does is degrading and damaging emotionally for men and women. This is actually not true. If done quite well by a professional, BDSM can be the opposite. According to Self, it is especially helpful for people who struggle with control and power dynamics.
● Many people believe that they are psychologically unhealthy. According to Psychology Today, practitioners are generally psychologically healthy, if not more so in some respects, compared to the general population.
● Many people often associate the a London dominatrix and BDSM with drug and alcohol use. This is a misconception and is actually not true. There is a clear line between BDSM and drug or alcohol use and the professional work of a London dominatrix do.
● Many people believe the work they do is not ‘noble’ enough. This criticism is not only in London but worldwide. Many people are not exactly accepting of that aspect of sexuality and I think with the proper orientation, people will come to see BDSM for what it truly is.
● Many people believe that a dominatrix do the work because they are not educated or intellectuals. This belief is false. Contrary to what many think, some are actually educated with degrees and certificates, passion is what drives them.
● Many people think that a London dominatrix and BDSM takes the erotic flair and romance out of an encounter. Many people find it hard to wrap their heads around the fact that inflicting pain could be erotic or romantic. Depending on the fetish or how professional the dominatrix is, BDSM could actually optimize eroticism.
● Many people believe that BDSM or the work a London dominatrix does have health implications. The current version of the American Psychiatric Association ‘s manual, DSM-5 , excludes consensual BDSM from diagnosis when the sexual interests cause no harm or distress. In 1995, Denmark became the first European Union country to have completely removed sadomasochism from its national classification of diseases. This was followed by Sweden in 2009, Norway in 2010 and Finland 2011.
● Many activists feel it is sexually negative on both the part of the man or woman. In contrast to this, it is sexually positive. It is a way to express sexuality in another dimension and overcome fears all the while fulfilling sexual fantasies and fetishes.